“Poly” Woman Really Just Speaks Three Languages
Duolingo AND Tinder blowing up
New AI Learns All the Reasons You Shouldn’t Text Him, Because Someone Has To
Silicon Valley recently unveiled the latest in artificial intelligence: BlockHIM is a new AI that learns all the reasons you shouldn’t text him, because someone has to.
Simply tell the program who you want to text, and BlockHIM will generate reminder after reminder…after reminder that he doesn’t have a bed frame, your dog hates him, and he sent your sister a dick pic. And it won’t stop until you get it, because BlockHIM is programmed to never be drunk and sad at 2 am.
Developers also announced they will soon launch a subscription service, BlockHIM Nightclub Bathroom edition. For just $9 a month, the tool will scrub all records of him from your phone, because you said you did it a month ago but you’re full of shit. It will then give you a tearful pep talk and invite you to do shots.
Perpetually Bitter Man Mentally Prepares Himself to Act Happy for Friend’s Success
"That's so great!"
Barbie Movie Scandal! Ken Nudes Leaked
Can't technically call it a dick pic
CEO Emails Back to Office Mandate from Third Home
It was either there or from his second yacht
Shaw Friends Find Perfect Rooftop to Judge Tourists on the Mall for Fourth of July
It's even better when you picture them sweating on a packed Metro car after
Man Crosses Street to Avoid Group of Children Potentially Criticizing Everything About Him
They're meaner in packs
35-Year Old Admits To Date He No Longer Has Netflix After Being Kicked Off Parent's Account
"We could Max and chillax?"
Woman With "Shop Local" Tote Picks Up Third Amazon Package This Week
In her defense, it was a (fashion) emergency