Sex Positions Named After DC Landmarks
National Mall = one partner sits on top and makes very slight movements back and forth like they’re riding a segway
White House = you’re only let inside if you have an appointment and photo ID, don’t touch anything!
Lincoln Memorial = he’s much bigger than you expected
Jefferson Memorial = dirty, nasty romp in pond scum
Smithsonian Castle = taking a five-year sabbatical from letting anyone in
Capitol building = butt plug
Washington Monument = full-on pegging
Hot Girl Summer! Seven Metro Escalators to Walk Up to Get a Beach Bod
Dupont, because it’s bound to be broken for 2/3 of the summer anyway
Wheaton, because your buns will be rock solid after hiking the longest escalator in the Western Hemisphere
L’Enfant, because you’ll get those reps in trying to find the way out
Rosslyn, because you’re only dating a guy in Arlington for access to his building’s rooftop pool
Woodley Park, because you’ve got to see that baby gorilla before the kids on field trips
Smithsonian, because you’ll get an extra workout avoiding tourists standing on the left
Dulles Airport, because you thought your flight was at DCA and now you’re fucked
Weird! This New DC Restaurant Doesn't Have a Gimmick!
Good food, pleasant service...what am I supposed to Instagram?
Sonic Boom Actually Arlington Woman Reaching the End of Hinge
And she's still single
Millennial Rebrands Her Age Spots as "Girlboss Freckles"
She MLM’d too close to the sun and now has skin damage
Target Caves, Moves Hot Dog Buns Out of Sandwich Aisle
The retailer will soon ban cauliflower from identifying as pizza
U St Vida to Offer Liver Personal Trainers for Pride
High Intensity Interval Tequila Shots
Maryland's 10 Best Bottomless Brunches You'll Never Have Because They’re in Maryland
Nobody wants to take the Red Line after seven mimosas
Tenleytown Couple Spent Two Hours at Concert in Capital One Arena, Four Hours Exiting the Parking Garage
We re-listened to Serial for the third time
Shaw Couple Splits After Realizing Nothing Left to Talk About After Succession Finale
“I love you but this is not a serious relationship”
